Quick: why is Breaking Dawn – the final book in the Twilight saga – more closely related to a sea lion or a llama than it is to a camel, a giraffe, or an African elephant? You probably know the answer to this already, but if for some reason it’s not coming to you instantly, I’ll get to it in a minute. But first, a newsy tidbit. In the world of TV, we have a report today that actor Jeff Goldblum is leaving Law & Order: Criminal Intent after two years. They say there’s no gossip or bad blood (that we’ll ever know about) but that he’s opted to leave once his contract’s up. Insiders are puzzled and point to all sorts of reasons (mostly uncertainty about the show’s future). But here’s another theory. A cursory check to his bio reveals that the guy is 58. So maybe after a zillion movies and TV shows he’s perhaps just plan tired. Did we ever think of that? I know they film L&O in NYC so maybe he has to walk around a lot; everyone does in Manhattan. And, as anyone who’s seen a Broadway show knows, “Now and Forever” can accurately represent the time it takes to get through Times Square on a busy day. I maintain a residence in New York City and one thing I do know is whenever I’m there I walk lots. Which is really good for you but it can be exhausting and maybe Jeff’s over that. Honestly, will I want to walk several miles a day when I’m 58? I have no idea. Fortunately that’s not for another 26 years, and by then we’ll all have Jet Packs, but still. Here’s hoping they’ll leave Jeff Goldblum alone. So back to Twilight. We know Breaking Dawn has been split into two movies (with Bill Condon directing both). But what’s just been announced is their respective release dates: November 18, 2011, and November 16, 2012. Which means that Twihards near and far will have two wait exactly 364 days OR 8736 hours. Which is slightly longer than it takes a sea lion to carry a sea lion pup. A llama? She’ll take about 330 days. The length of time that a giraffe, a camel, or a walrus takes to have a baby is much longer – between 410 and 450 days. And if you really think it’s a long time between Breaking Dawn part 1 and Breaking Dawn part 2 – just remember, things could be worse. I have news for Twi-tweens and Twi-moms: an African elephant will still be waiting for the stork even after both movies are done (they stay pregnant for 660 days!) Speaking of cute babies – I just spent way too much time looking at Angelina Jolie’s super-enchanting brood. Tomorrow, we’ll discuss the new (and reportedly scathing) tell-all about Angie. For now though, let’s take a look at long-beloved (and maybe even long-in-the-tooth) stars who are returning to TV in brand new shows. Voice your choice in today’s featured poll and let us know which of these guys is your favorite:
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