I would watch Jason Bateman in pretty much anything (besides maybe a long line at the DMV). And today’s a good day to manifest that sentiment because The Switch is opening in theaters everywhere. Plus, it also stars Jennifer Aniston, Jeff Goldblum and Patrick Wilson. Not a lot of downside. This will, I am almost certain, fall into my “Forgotten Two “ Category (a very common listing for comedies where they may not be The Best Thing You’ve Ever Seen but you sure forget where you were for two hours. Which you have to admit — in the anxiety-ridden climes of today — is not such a bad thing). And so what if the trailer gives us 89% of the movie’s plot. There’s still time before the movie begins to try and guess what the remaining six lines of dialogue might be. Now, is anyone bothered by the advertising campaign for this movie? While I like to think of myself as somewhat progressive, I’m still not 100% sure that movie studios ever really need to display sample cups on movie posters, regardless of the bodily fluids contained therein. It just seems a little gratuitous. But that’s just me. Also in theaters, and speaking of gratuitous, let’s not forget about Piranha 3D. Which looks like a supremely gory, bloody, shocking (but not unpredictable) story. In fact, the formula is totally similar to many others we’ve seen, as in: a cataclysmic geological event unleashes a herd/flock/family/scores of deadly ________ s, who must feed as soon as possible. The aggressive ______s then discover and attack an unsuspecting/vacationing/unwitting group of hikers/campers/partygoers/lovers/children. This formula may also be one for box office success, since it’s in 3D (all the rage this year) and it will likely attract the crowd that’s already seen The Expendables and is now looking for an adrenaline rush. Plus let’s not forget P3D also stars Richard Dreyfus and Christopher Lloyd. Another flick in theaters this weekend is one of the best reviewed kids’ movies of the summer — Nanny McPhee Returns. Now your young boys may want to go see Piranha but if you can coax them into this, Emma Thompson is getting nothing but glowing reviews for her portrayal of the lady who “appears when she’s not wanted and leaves when she is”. Then, for bored teens who may have tired of Twilight, there’s Vampires Suck from the guys who brought us Date Movie and Epic Movie. We can probably expect lowbrow, lowest common denominator stuff, although who knows, maybe the Twi-Mania is so extreme these days that the hordes will flock to see even something that parodies the beloved franchise. There’s also the latest Bow Wow starrer, Lottery Ticket which looks pretty funny – this one’s about a guy who has to keep his greedy friends and family away from his $370 million dollar golden ticket. So there you have it. I’m guessing that The Expendables will continue to dominate at the box office and that these other newbies will fall in line behind it. Fortunately for Jason Bateman and Jennifer Aniston, I’ve already bought my tickets to The Switch. Which should put them ahead of the pack right out of the gate. For our poll, since Piranha 3D is opening, let’s take a look at some other scary movies with animals gone wild. Voice your choice in today’s featured poll and tell us which of these creature infestation films is your favorite:
4) Snakes on a Plane
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